It's Time to Break Up With "Fine"Feb 01, 2021
That word fine – what does it actually tell us? Not a lot – it’s a bit “comme ci, comme ca” but that sounds much more interesting (probably because I’m English😂).
Fine tends to be a stock answer to any question beginning how are – you, things, life. It doesn’t instil any excitement or joy. Even if we say the weathers fine – yes it normally means it’s not raining but other than that it’s a bit non-descript.
So, I’ve declared the word redundant. It’s not how I want to feel about anything and when talking to people I want to know properly what’s going on. If things are good, say so. If things are bad, say so. If things are a bit mixed or could be better, say so.Fine can keep you stuck
I think it’s easy to get stuck in the “fine” mentality. So, we just keep going with things being fine.
But ask yourself “don’t I want more?”
How would it feel to be excited about life?
How would it feel to be doing more of what makes you happy?
How would it feel if you were looking forward to plans in the pipeline?
I get it, it might feel harder at the moment – but even in the situation we find ourselves in it is possible to feel excited, to focus on what makes you happy. For many the snow we had the other day here in the UK, was a welcome break and something different to get excited about.
In every-day life why settle for fine? Why not strive for more, to feel more, to be more, to experience more. What are the things you’ve always wanted to do, what are your dreams that lay hidden? What is it you want from and for your life?
Just because you may be in your 40’s or 50’s and it feels easier to leave things as they are, to maintain what is, the status quo – is that what you really want? Use age as a motivator not as an excuse to stay the same. I’ve got braver, more confident and done so many things in the last decade that I never thought I would do. (read more here)
You might think your dreams and goals aren’t worthwhile, not important, but if they are your dreams and goals they are. Not all of us have dreams of travelling the world, scaling mountains, building big businesses some of us dream of living in the country, by the sea, to spend more time doing what we love, to learn an instrument, a foreign language, to paint – whatever it is,
If it’s your dream go for it.What do you want?
What is it keeping you stuck?
Is it a lack of confidence to go after it? Is it a feeling it’s too late to start? Maybe you’re not sure of what it is you want to do but you know you want something different.
It’s not too late – it’s MIDlife – you’re not 80 or 90 (although still keep going for it!) Yes it can feel that time flies by and you may think “how on earth am I this old already” (been there) but the time is going to pass anyway so why not go after what you want. Why not explore what you really want from life?
We can struggle with our identity shifting as we get older. Particularly, if you’ve structured your life around children and family. You can feel as though your purpose has gone as they grow up – your role changes so it’s understandable to question what you’re supposed to do now. Do you want to stay in the job you’re doing or if you’ve been a stay-at-home mum what do you want to do with the extra time you now have?
What stories are you telling yourself that are stopping you make change? (read more here)
I can help
I get it, I’ve been there, but through coaching and my training I now feel excited about this stage of life and all that’s available and on offer.